Four years ago, on ISASC's opening day, I gazed at the brand-new school before me yet felt the same emotions as when I first viewed the construction site—back when the school was unfinished and I stood on the small hill across from the main gate, watching the skeletal structure surrounded by steel reinforcements. Sitting in the auditorium during my first visit, I observed the advanced equipment gleaming under bright lights on stage, yet could not find any meaningful signs of use; the football field's turf was maintained too perfectly, lacking the ruggedness one would expect from an athletic ground. At that moment, I realized that ISASC's "newness" represented "innovation" to me, harboring countless possibilities for breakthrough and transformation.

四年前，ISASC对外开放的第一天，我看着眼前崭新的学校，却只有看ISASC还被工人们架着钢筋围着绿布时一样的感受（其实在ISASC还没建好的时候我就来过了，那时候我就站在ISASC大门对面的小坡上，看着它）。第一次走进来的我在auditorium坐着，舞台上有着先进的设备，照着明亮的灯，但从未有人在上面留下让人印象深刻的记忆。足球场的草修的整齐，却少了一些它应该有的贫瘠。那一刻，新学校的“新”对我来说是创新的“新”，是无限个“突破和改变”的机会。

Later, I became among the first members of ISASC's football team and one of the earliest students to establish clubs. I continuously explored possibilities for campus service initiatives in my capacity as a student—these were opportunities granted by ISASC's "newness," and also the result of my actively embracing it.

后来，我成为了第一组加入足球队的球员，成为了第一批创立自己club的学生之一，再之后不断的以学生的身份开拓校内service的可能性。而这些都是ISASC的“新”给我的机会，也是我与之拥抱的结果。

Those moments of cheering on the field, celebrating successful club activities, and rushing about for various service projects once made me believe I had grasped the meaning of happiness. However, upon entering the DP program, I discovered how fragile this certainty was. During my most confusing and anxious days in the DP program, I found myself crying almost daily. "You're so inadequate"—these words pierced my heart without needing to be spoken aloud. I isolated myself, becoming completely entrapped in fears of "what if I don't get into university, what if I cannot succeed" (though at that time, I hadn't even defined what "success" meant to me).

When did things begin to change?

而那些在球场上欢呼，在club里庆祝着活动成功，为service奔波的时刻，让我以为已经找到了幸福的意义。但进入DP阶段后，我才发现这种确信是多么脆弱。在DP阶段最迷茫和焦虑的时刻，我几乎每天都在哭泣。“你很差劲”类似的话还没从我的嘴里说出来就先刺向我的心里。我孤立了自己，完全陷入了“如果进不去大学，如果没有成功“的假设焦虑（当时的我甚至没有定义自己想要的成功是什么）。

事情是在什么时候改变的呢？

In my memories, I found a particular scene: I was walking alone on Zhujiang Road when a large family approached from the opposite direction. Their laughter was so cheerful it overpowered the music in my headphones. Several children, bouncing around energetically, accidentally bumped into me—this simple moment made me stop and turn, watching as they gradually disappeared into the distance. In that instant, I seemed to feel from them a simple happiness unrelated to success or academic achievement. From then on, I developed an irrepressible love for walking. Couples holding hands on the street, young people cycling swiftly by, a family of three jogging together... merely observing these ordinary scenes gave me a sense of happiness.

我在记忆里找到了一幅景象。那时我一个人在珠江道散步，前面有一大家子人向我走来。他们聊天时的笑声很大，大到穿透了我耳机里的音乐声，有几个小孩蹦蹦跳跳跑着，最后撞到了我。就这样简单的一幕，让我站在原地转身看着他们走远。我好像从他们身上感受到了平淡的，无关乎成功和成绩的幸福。从那时候起，我开始一发不可收拾地散步。在街上，牵着手路过的小情侣，骑单车的青年们，一起慢跑的一家三口的景象只是看着就让我有了幸福的感觉。

But this happiness, though visibly before me, somehow remained out of reach. Only now, as I write this, do I realize: what I experienced was a feeling of happiness, not happiness itself.

So when did I actually begin to recognize that I was truly experiencing happiness?

As I write this, I find myself searching for the answer to this question: perhaps I have been living in happiness for a long time already, and the true realization of this fact is only occurring at this very moment.

但这样的幸福在我面前，又好像离我很远。在写这篇文章的时候我才想明白，那是幸福感，而不是幸福。

那从什么时候我才意识到自己的幸福的呢？

写到这里，我不禁思考这一问题。或许在很久以前我就生活在“幸福“中了，但真正意识到这件事是在这一刻。

I am fascinated by bold, dramatic makeup, passionate about unconventional fashion choices, and immersed in the world of cosplay due to my childish "heroism" and somewhat juvenile fantasies. The genuine appreciation in my mother's eyes, my younger brother's enthusiastic participation as my prop master, and my father's resigned smile as he walks by (seeing us so happy, he must be pleased deep down—at least that's what I believe). Standing at the center of this heartwarming scene, I suddenly feel a sense of wonder. Even in this moment without any labels of achievement, I can still stand here so happily, simply existing.

Perhaps to achieve success, I must accomplish certain things. But in this moment, I finally understand that even without accomplishing anything, I already possess the right to "exist" happily.

我喜欢化很浓的妆，喜欢穿特别的衣服，因为自己幼稚的“英雄”主义和中二病我喜欢玩cosplay。妈妈眼中真实的欣赏，弟弟乐此不疲的当道具组，爸爸也只是无奈一笑地走了过去（看到我们这么开心，他心里应该是高兴的吧，至少我是这么认为的）。处于这一幕中心的我有些恍惚。在这没有任何优绩标签的时刻，我却能如此幸福的站在这里，存在在这里。

或许，为了成功，我必须要完成某些事。但是即使没有完成什么事情，现在也可以就这样幸福地“存在”。

If happiness only requires "existence," does that mean we no longer need to strive? For me, this doesn't seem to be the case.

Previously, my sense of self-worth was entirely built upon external validation. I participated frantically in activities and pursued academic awards, accumulating achievements like collecting medals. Gradually, I began to feel anxious about unsuccessful events and distressed by competition failures. This fear became a whip, driving me to complete one task after another. I fell into a terrible cycle where the causes and effects of anxiety accumulated: the more anxious I became, the harder I pushed myself; the harder I pushed, the more anxious I felt. What was ultimately depleted was my initial enthusiasm and vitality.

既然幸福只需要“存在”就好了，那是不是什么都不用努力了呢？对我来说，好像并不是这样的。

在很早的时候，我的贡献感几乎来自外界，所以我拼命的参加活动，刷学术比赛。慢慢的，我会因为害怕活动没人参加，比赛没有拿到奖而感到焦虑和不安，这样的恐惧让我更加努力地去完成这些任务。我像陷入了一个循环，焦虑的因果不断在我身上累积，消耗的却只有自己的热情和精力。

This fixation changed during the summer of tenth grade. I visited a guide dog school where the rigorous training of guide dogs and the difficult circumstances of blind individuals were starkly presented. Upon returning to school, several classmates and I established the Blind Support Group with one pure intention: to convey what I had witnessed and felt at the guide dog school to more people. We designed a "Treasure Hunt" activity where participants searched for objects in complete darkness; later developed a "Gift Delivery" charity sale; and eventually grew into the large-scale "Dress to Impress" fundraiser. Each step took me further from the self trapped in that cycle of anxiety.

这样的想法是在十年级的夏天被改变的。我去参观了导盲犬学校，导盲犬培训的严苛和盲人生活苦难处境被赤裸裸的摆在我面前。回到学校后，我和几个同学相约成立了Blind Support Group，脑子里只有把在导盲犬学校了解到的一切和感受传递到其他community的想法。我们从“Treasure hunt”让学生蒙着眼睛在black box寻宝，体验盲人的视角，再做到“Gift delivery”通过售卖和配送礼物筹集捐款，再做到“Dress to impress”这样更大的活动。

I finally understood that activities and competitions are merely channels for understanding the world and myself. For this reason, I must challenge myself more, do more things, and experience more setbacks. Through the Blind Support Group, I not only encountered previously unimagined hardships but also discovered my latent leadership and execution abilities in the darkness. Through the volunteer group, I realized how powerful my organizational skills were. When derogatory terms toward women appeared on the International Women's Day bulletin board, the burning anger allowed me to truly experience the disrespect and inequality women face. These experiences provided opportunities to connect with others, receive help, and find a sense of contribution by helping others. I suddenly understood my college counselor's words: "What matters isn't the name of the activity or award, but your experiences, growth, and insights gained." I believe that in personal statements, such authentic feelings and experiences are most compelling. Additionally, I hope the university where I spend the next four years will be a place that understands what I truly care about, embraces my efforts and passions, and resonates with me.

我明白，活动也好比赛也罢，无非是让我了解世界和自己的途径，所以我要挑战自己去做更多的事，经历更多的挫折。因为Blind Support Group，我看到了世界上我无法接触到的苦难，看到了自己身上的从没有注意到的领导力和执行力。因为volunteer group，我才意识到自己的组织能力是多么的强大。因为International women’s day宣传板上出现的对女性具有侮辱性的词汇，我才直面地看到女性所遭受的不尊重，感受到自己对不平等的愤怒。因为这些我才有机会和他人建立联系，受到他人的帮助或是在帮助他人中找到贡献感。我突然理解了升学老师那句：“重要的不是活动名称和奖项，而是你在其中的经历，成长和感悟。”我相信在文书里，这样真实的感受和经历才是最打动人的。此外，我也希望未来四年我生活的大学是一个了解我真正关心的人和事，包容我为之努力和动容，与我同频共振的地方。

Therefore, I firmly believe that challenges that seem to require all our strength are precisely the opportunities to reshape ourselves. I will continue running forward—not only to encounter a broader world but also to discover a better version of myself that I have yet to recognize.

所以，我相信那些看上去会让我付出极大努力的事情，也可以成为帮助我找到自己和改变自己的力量。我会努力，为了看到更多的自己和更大的世界。

In elementary school, I had no name, only nicknames. I seemed to be treated as an outlet for others' frustrations, where any random behavior could become a reason for them to vent their anger. When going to lunch, I would walk alone, staring at the floor counting the crosswalks in the school—one, two, three, four... nine in total. Five years passed this way.

在小学的时候，我没有名字，只有外号。我好像被当成了宣泄的工具，随意一个行为就能成为他们发泄怒火的理由。去吃饭的时候也只是一个人走在路上，盯着地板数着学校里的斑马线，一二三四…一共有九条。就这样过了五年。

I transferred to a place where no one knew me. But those looks of pity, mockery, and exclusion had already taken root within me, and the sun of insecurity in my heart shone ever more brightly, nourishing them. Fearing another experience like before, I tried to please those around me, carefully observing everyone's actions. I tried not to provoke anyone's anger, yet my naturally carefree personality contradicted this effort. This split between personality and behavior made people dislike me even more. During that time, I believed others' assessments of me and was convinced of their dislike. I used to enjoy flaunting this unfortunate history, as if it provided a suitable reason for my character flaws, sometimes even wielding it as a weapon to maintain my "uniqueness." Thus, I often wallowed in my own misfortune.

我转走了，转到了一个没人认识我的地方。但那些怜悯，嘲笑和排斥的目光早已在我身体里生根发芽，内心里自卑的太阳也照的越发热烈，滋养着它们。我害怕再经历一次，所以我讨好着身边的人们，小心翼翼的观察着每一个人的举动。我尽量不去激起别人的怒火，但我大大咧咧的性格却与之矛盾。性格和行为的割裂反而更加引得人讨厌。那时候的我相信着他人对我的评价，坚信着他人对我的厌恶。曾经的我很喜欢夸耀这段不幸，好似这样就能为我人格和性格上的缺陷找到一个适当的理由，有时还能将它当作保持“特别”的武器，所以那时候的我常常沉浸在自己的不幸里。

When did I escape from this? As I write this, I find myself perplexed. When exactly did experiences that neither time nor space could diminish cease to bind me?

什么时候摆脱这些的？写到这里，我有些疑惑地问我自己。曾经时间和空间都无法冲淡的经历到底是从什么时候不再捆绑住我自己的？

Again, I cannot find the answer. I no longer mention this to others. Even in describing it above, I only recall my own feelings. That experience is no longer an excuse for myself or a narrative to evoke sympathy from others. It simply exists as a part of my life, resting quietly, waiting for me to revisit and reinterpret when reflecting on my life and exploring myself. My interpretation of that experience seems to have changed—it was immature behavior during childhood, a "group activity" and "behavior" meant to enhance their "cohesion." It is part of my growth. Because of this experience, I can better filter and internally process others' evaluations of me, find motivation for deeper self-exploration, and have the courage to answer the question "Who am I?" without quoting others. Perhaps from a certain moment, my interpretation shifted from focusing on what happened to me or what others did to me, to centering on "myself"—considering from the perspective of "change" what all these events have brought to me.

这一次，我也找不到答案。我早已不再向他人提起这件事。即使是在前文描述时，我也只记得有关于自己的感受。那样的经历不再是我为自己辩解的理由，为了激起别人同情的一套说辞。它只是平淡地成为我人生的一部分、平静地躺在那里，等我回顾人生、探索自我时再把年幼的自己捞出来解读一遍。我对那一场经历的诠释似乎早已改变，它是孩童时期的不成熟行为，为了增进他们“凝聚力”的一种“团体活动“和“行为”，它是我成长的一部分。因为这样的经历，我才能更好的去筛选和内部处理他人对我的评价，才有动力对“我“有更深刻的探索，才能在回答”我是谁？“这一问题时，有勇气不再引用他人的话语。或许从某一刻开始，我对事物的诠释不再是我遭遇了什么，别人对我做了什么，而是以“我”为中心，从“改变”的角度出发，思考我经历的一切事件给我带来什么。

The DP program was the stage where I truly recognized myself. Those questions I once evaded with "I don't know" or "I'll deal with that later" were forced upon me by some unknown power during the DP. I needed to decide on my DP courses, determine my future major, and consider my career after graduation. For my bewildered self then, these were like hot potatoes—impossible to discard yet difficult to resolve. I dared not definitively state what I wanted to do in the future because I wasn't sure if it was the right path. This was perhaps an unsolvable problem, as no one can guarantee what the future holds.

DP是让我彻底认清自己的阶段。曾经那些我可以用“我不知道“，”以后的事以后再说“这样的话搪塞过去的问题，在DP的时候被一股莫名的力量按着头去面对。我要确定DP的选课，确定以后学什么专业，毕业之后做什么工作。这对当时懵懂的我来说就像一块烫手的山芋，扔不掉也解决不了。我不敢肯定的说自己以后要干什么，因为我不知道这是否是正确的路。这是个无解题吧，毕竟没人能保证未来是什么样。

Looking back, it's somewhat amusing that someone like me who wasn't particularly interested in academics discovered my dream while writing my Extended Essay (EE). I chose Business Management as my EE subject and, with some personal interest, selected a gaming company I liked and a question I genuinely wanted answered

不过，回想起来有些好笑，我这么一个对学习不感兴趣的人居然是在写EE（Extended Essay）的时候确定自己的梦想的。我选了Business Management当我的EE subject，在选分析对象的时候，带着一点自己的私心，我选了自己喜欢的游戏公司，选了一个自己疑惑好奇且真心想要知道答案的问题。

Starting with researching the company's background, I examined their employee handbook and reviewed official messages in gaming communities. In their handbook, they referred to their corporate culture as "How to Train a Passerby Hero," their corporate mission as "Tech Otakus Save the World," and their vision as creating a "Honkai Realm." Even now, reviewing this gives me a sense of excitement and passion, as if someone had brought to life the whimsical yet beautiful fantasy world from my childhood and delivered it through the medium of games—an extraordinarily fulfilling notion. Through writing my EE, I confirmed that my ultimate wish was to join this "creation action."

就这样，我从找这家公司的背景信息开始，到翻看它的员工手册，再划看游戏社区里的一条条官方消息。在员工手册里，她会把企业文化称为“路人英雄的养成方法”，她的企业使命是“技术宅拯救世界”，她的愿景是创造出一个“崩坏神域”。直到现在再看一遍我也会觉得很热血很兴奋，好似有人把我小时候无厘头且不切实际但又美好的幻想世界做出来，再以游戏作为媒介传递出来，这是何等幸福的事。因为写EE这个契机，我确定了，我的终极愿望就是加入到这个“创世行动”里。

▲This was the diagram in the official employee handbook that caught my attention. The upper one is what I learned in my BM class, while the lower one is miHoYo's actual, naturally evolved organizational structure. At that moment, I suddenly realized concretely that knowledge doesn't exist only in textbooks—there is much naturally developed knowledge in the world, and I wanted to experience firsthand the aspects that interested me.

▲ 这是官方员工手册里让我眼前一亮的图，上面那张是我在BM课上学过的，而下面是miHoYo的真实的自然进化的组织结构。那一刻，我突然具体地意识到知识不是只存在于课本中，世界上有很多自然生长的知识，而我想要去切身的体验那些我感兴趣的它们。

"If after reading this book you feel excited and passionate, then congratulations—you've come to the right place. Let's create our future together. You will be a vital core in continuing and carrying forward our culture and vision."

▲ This passage appeared on the last page of the employee handbook, which I read only after completing the entire chapter above. It was a wonderful feeling.

▲ 这段话在员工手册的最后一页，是我在写完上面这一整章才读到的，很奇妙的感觉。

Writing this now, excitement has made me forget that I was reflecting on the DP program. It was similar when writing my EE—upon completion, I realized I had written thousands of words. What I want to express is that during the DP, a time of uncertainty yet proximity to the future, it's easy to fall into nihilism without careful attention. But it is precisely these challenging processes, attempts at different subjects, things, and activities that allow us to find our sense of contribution and belonging, enabling us to discover our expectations for the future inadvertently. On the difficult DP journey, we can incorporate our personal interests into mundane tasks and essays—like planting small flowers along a bumpy road, potentially paving a path we desire.

写到这里，兴奋感已经让我忘记了自己是在写DP的感想。当时写EE的时候似乎也是这样，写完时发现已经洋洋洒洒几千字了。其实我想说的是，在DP这样无法确定却又靠近未来的时刻，只要稍微一不注意就容易陷入到虚无主义中。但正是这些辛苦的过程，对不同学科，事物和活动的尝试，才能让我们找到属于自己的贡献感和归属感，让我们在不经意间找到自己对未来的期望。在DP这条难走的道路上，我们可以在无聊的tasks和essays夹带点自己感兴趣的私货，就像在坎坷的路上顺带种点小花，或许能铺成一条自己想要的路。

At the end of this article, I would like to explain what I mean by a world "more real" than reality in the title.

We do not live in a shared world, but in the worlds shaped by our own interpretations.（From The Source of Courage) Events in reality often occur objectively. I believe what affects me has never been this objectivity, but rather the feelings, emotions, and series of reactions that arise within me when immersed in these objective events.

During this period of self-reflection, I have been gradually exploring this world isolated from reality. In this independent world, I have the opportunity to contemplate the sources of my suffering, to seek the origins of my sense of contribution and belonging, and to determine how to respond to external stimuli. The conclusions I have reached and the actions I have taken are all based on my purest and strongest free will. I can firmly tell myself, "It is not others, but me—I myself have chosen to do this." This feels more authentic and reassuring than the reactions triggered by events in the real world. This entire article is the product of my immersion in this independent world that belongs only to me, which is also the source of this title.

在这篇文章的末尾，我想解释一下标题中所谓的比现实更加“真实”的世界是什么。

人并非活在同一个世界里，而是活在自己诠释的世界里。（《勇气的源泉》）现实中的事件往往是客观发生的。我相信影响我的从来不是这些客观性，而是在我沉浸在这些客观事件时，内心所产生出的感受、情绪等一系列反应。

我在写这篇文章，思考自我的这段时间，也在慢慢探索这一隔绝现实的世界。在这个独立的世界，我有机会去反思我为何痛苦，有机会去找寻我贡献感和归属感的来源，决定如何反应外在事件的刺激。其中，我所得出的结论所做出的行动，都基于我最纯粹最强烈的自由意志，我能坚定地告诉自己“不是别人，就是我，是我自己选择这么做的。”，这比现实世界事件发生所带给我的反应更加真实，也更加令人安心。而这一整篇文章就是我沉浸在这只属于我的独立世界的产物，也是这一标题的来源。

While writing this article, I was reading books by Ichiro Kishimi and Fumitake Koga ("Sometimes I Really Feel Desperate," "The Courage to Be Disliked," and "The Courage to Be Rejected"). Their interpretation of Adlerian psychology and thoughts on humanity have become the foundation for this article and my self-exploration and discovery. I also thank them for repeatedly evoking painful, anxious, and sad memories I had deliberately buried, then soothing these emotions in a gentle and philosophical manner, allowing me to truly let go and move forward. Finally, I am happy to have had the opportunity to "dialogue" with such philosophers during my confused and bewildered seventeen years.

在写这篇文章时，我正在读岸见一郎和古贺史健的书（《有时真的很绝望》，《被拒绝的勇气》和《被讨厌的勇气》）。他门对阿德勒心理学思想的转述，以及他对人的思考几乎成为了这篇文章以及我的自我探索和发现的基底。同时，我也感谢他通过书籍一次次勾起我刻意掩埋的痛苦焦虑难过的回忆，再以温和和哲学的方式安抚这些情绪，让我真正释怀然后前进。最后，很开心能在我迷茫懵懂的十七岁和这样两位哲人有“对话”的机会。

Furthermore, "I" am fluid, which is also my desired state of life. Therefore, the content of this article represents only my thoughts at a certain moment or state. The entire article, while presenting my student story, is also my recollection and reflection on the past seventeen years. I have deeply analyzed every moment in my life, faced my defects and weaknesses, and acknowledged and expressed my happiness. Although this article reveals only a small portion, it might be my bravest attempt at self-expression.

此外，“我”是流动的，这也是我期望的人生状态。所以，文章的内容仅为在某一时刻或状态下我的想法。整篇文章在展现我的学生故事的同时，也是我对自己过去十七年的回忆和反思。我深刻地刨析我生命里的每一刻，面对自己的缺陷和软弱，承认和表达自己的幸福，尽管这篇文章只展现了很小一部分，但这或许是我对自己最勇敢的一次。

Some people's qualities have influenced and changed parts of me, while others have been present in my life, helping me overcome certain difficulties. Regardless of how each relationship concluded, your existence has been important to me. I also want to use this opportunity to reflect on and record how you have influenced and shaped me, making this acknowledgment the longest and most important div of my article.

有些人的品质影响了我，然后改变了我的一部分，有些人则是存在在我的生活里，和我一起跨过了某些难关。不管每段关系的结局如何，你们的存在对我来说都是重要的。同时，我也想借此来思考和记录我被你们所影响和塑造的地方，所以致谢将会是这篇文章最长的一节，也是最重要的一段。

First, I thank my parents, younger brother, and youngest brother who have supported my decisions regardless of the circumstances. In my memory, no matter how much my thoughts, interests, and hobbies might have contradicted social norms or your common sense, you were always the first to stand up and support me. You gave me the confidence and courage to try different things and explore myself. Your presence provides me with a "home" where I can "rest and recover." I firmly believe this.

首先，感谢无论何时都支持我的决定的爸爸妈妈，小弟以及小小弟。在我的印象里，不管我的思想、兴趣和爱好多么的违背社会主流违背你们的常识，你们都是第一个站出来支持我的。是你们让我有底气和勇气去尝试不同的事物，尝试探索我自己，是你们的存在才能让我有“家“这样可以”休息回血“的地方，我永远坚定的相信着这一点。

I thank Ms. Cao Guanghuan. Everything about you continues to influence me. You are progressive, always on the path of learning, and frequently remind me of the power of education. You are cheerful; when I enthusiastically decorate my room or work on cosplay props, you always approach with excitement as if discovering something new. I often think my optimistic and cheerful personality might come from you. You are my guide, and we sometimes talk late into the night. For those confused questions I have about society and the future, you always share your experiences and answers immediately. When I'm hurt, you're even more anxious than I am, both scolding me for not taking better care of myself while helping me clean my wounds with disinfectant. Through you, I see what love is, which is also what I'm learning from you. In short, everything about you has been gradually influencing me since birth—an inseparable part of who I am today for which I am grateful.

感谢曹光欢女士，你的一切始终都在影响着我。你很上进，你总是在学习的路上，也常常叮嘱我学习的力量。你很开朗，在我乐此不疲的布置房间捣鼓cos道具的时候，你总是像发现了新鲜东西一样兴致冲冲的来帮我。我时常想，我这样乐观开朗的性格或许是因为你吧。你是我的引路人，我们有时会聊到深夜。那些我对社会和未来的懵懂问题，你总是第一时间告诉我她的经验和答案。在我受伤时，你总是比我还着急，一边埋怨我不好好爱自己一边拿着消毒水帮我清理，我在你身上看到了什么是爱，这也是我正在从你身上学习的东西。总之，你身上的一切从我出生起就在慢慢影响我，是当下的我不可剥离并报以感谢的一部分。

I thank Mr. Zhou Shuqin. In my memory, from a very young age, I followed behind you "patrolling" the factory. Little me watched you direct others, occasionally showing anger, then explaining those "business principles" I couldn't understand. Now when I participate in activities or group work, I often unconsciously place myself in a leadership position. I think this must be your influence. I enjoy the feeling of organizing and leading, finding my sense of contribution and belonging through it. So I thank you for these influences and teachings, which have given me the opportunity, ability, and motivation to experience more and become who I am today.

感谢周书钦先生。在记忆里，很小的时候我就跟在你身后“巡逻”工厂了。那时小小的我看着你指挥其他人，有时露出生气的表情，然后开始讲那些我听不懂的“商业大道理”。而现在的我在做活动，做小组作业的时候总是不自觉的把自己放在领导者的位置上，我想，这应该是受到了你的影响吧。我很享受组织和带领的感觉，我从中找到了属于我的贡献感和归属感，所以我感谢你影响且教会我的这些，让我有机会，能力和动力体验到更多，然后成为现在的我。

I thank my dear xy. This is a relationship I cannot fully express. Rather than saying you provided encouragement, it's more accurate to say I entrusted part of myself to you. You are one of my outlets for emotional expression, a subject on whom I can place my hopes, someone who allows me to discover and face my emotional needs and vulnerabilities. I increasingly enjoy being with you, and your loveliness lies in how, through you, I like myself and see myself. In my growth, such experiences have made my understanding of myself more complete. In my world, you hold this important meaning.

感谢我亲爱的xy，这是一段我自己都无法言说的关系。与其说你给予了我鼓励，倒不如说是我把自己的一部分寄托在了你的身上。你是我宣泄情感的途径之一，你是我能够寄托期望的主体，你是能让我发现和直面自己的情感需求和脆弱的人。所以我越来越喜欢和你呆在一起，而你的可爱之处在于，透过你我喜欢我自己，看到了我自己。在我的成长里，是这样的经历让我对自己的了解更加完整，在我的世界里，你有这样重要的意义。

I thank my close friend zbc. This is the first and only friendship I've maintained beyond the social environment of school. We traveled thousands of kilometers to a place where we walked together in the early morning, explored various corners of the city, tried new things, and fulfilled our small promises to each other. Meeting you was one of the few things I looked forward to during the anxious, dim application season. At that time, I seemed to once again feel the excitement and anticipation from the night before a childhood spring outing. Thank you for listening carefully when I speak, hearing me confide those troubles and confusions I cannot express to others. You are a friend with whom I share interests, someone I am willing to trust and confide in. Having you accompany me on my journey makes me feel very happy.

感谢我的挚友zbc。这是我第一个也是唯一一个即使脱离学校这种社会环境依旧能够维持的友谊。我们跨过几千公里去到一个地方，一起在凌晨散步聊天，一起穿梭在城市的各个角落，一起去尝试新的事物，一起兑现两个人的小承诺。和你见面是我在焦虑昏暗的申请季里少有的值得我期待的事情，那时候的我似乎再一次感受到了小时候春游前一晚上的激动兴奋和期待。谢谢你能认真的听我讲话，听我向你倾诉那些我无法向他人开口诉说的烦恼和疑惑。你是我兴趣相投的好友，你是我愿意信赖和倾诉的人，在我的生活里能有你陪着我前进，我觉得很幸福。

I thank my companion Katherrrrrrrr. I still remember one night when we sat on the sofa talking until two in the morning without phones or any distractions. Thank you for sharing your joys and troubles with me, and for always listening attentively when I speak. Additionally, thank you for organizing the Blind Support Group with me these three years, and most importantly, for sharing the hardships and troubles, the passion and joy. I can say with certainty that without you, I could hardly have persisted until now. In short, you are a friend who progresses with me and with whom I can confide—my most important companion during my student years.

感谢我的同伴Katherrrrrrrr。我仍然记得有天晚上，我们坐在沙发上，没有手机没有任何打扰地聊到了凌晨两点，谢谢你愿意把开心和烦恼讲给我听，也谢谢你总是认真听我讲话。除此之外，谢谢你在这三年里和我一起把Blind Support Group一起组织下去，最最重要的是谢谢你和我分担其中的辛苦和烦恼，和我一起享受其中的热情和快乐。我可以很确定地说，如果没有你，我一个人很难坚持到现在。总之，你是和我一起前进，可以互相倾诉的朋友，你是我学生时代最重要的同伴。

I thank my friend wxy. Thank you for being so brave in fighting against unfair behaviors toward you and us. The courage that often appears in you perhaps planted a small seed in my heart when you and I experienced certain things. Furthermore, thank you for being so pure—those moments when you were moved by a little cat, an animation, or a feeling, all touched me, making me exclaim, "How wonderful." I haven't yet found the reason for being moved, but in the future, when I am touched again, I will remember that someone once gave me such a feeling, allowing me to slightly sense the beauty of the world.

感谢我的朋友wxy。谢谢你如此勇敢的去对抗那些对你、对我们不公的行为，那些你身上常常出现的勇气或许在你和我经历某些事的时候在我心里埋下了一颗小小的种子。此外，也谢谢你如此的纯真，那些你因为一只小猫，一段动画片，一段感情所感动的时刻，都会触动到我，让我忍不住感叹“真好”。现在的我还没找到被触动的原因，但在以后，在再被感动的那一刻，我会记起这样的感动曾经有个人也给过我，让那时的我微微地感受到了世界的美好。

I thank my friend wly. Thinking about it, perhaps you are the person who has changed me the most. Those moments when you strive, challenge, and focus on what you love have repeatedly made me fall into deep thought. Such passion often seems to infect me, encouraging me to explore myself a little more, then a little more. We stay in bookstores until late at night, discussing our thoughts after finishing the same book, sharing those moments moved by the content. I very much enjoy listening to you speak; in your words are worlds I have never seen before. I often exclaim how wonderful it is to have such a person in my life. So, thank you for your existence.

感谢我的朋友wly。想了想，或许你是让我改变的最多的人。那些你为自己的热爱而努力，挑战和专注自己的时刻，一次又一次让我陷入沉思，那样的热情似乎也常常感染我，让我对自己的探索多一点再多一点。我们一起在书店呆到深夜，读完同一本书后畅聊自己的感想，分享那些被书中内容打动的瞬间。我很喜欢听你讲话，在你的话语中都是我从前没有看到过的世界。我也时常因此感叹道有这样一个人在我的生活里真好。所以，谢谢你的存在。

I thank ISA. Every person, every breeze, and every ray of sunshine at ISA has gradually swept away the dust that time and the past have accumulated on my nature. ISA is like a stage where, if I wish, there are opportunities and different people to help me showcase myself. Because of this, in just four years, I could transform from a shy, not very brave, or mature child into one who can face their ambitions, needs, and everything. This is where I understand and gain a sense of belonging and contribution, so I sincerely thank all encounters with ISA.

感谢ISA。ISA中的每一个人，每一缕风和阳光都在一点点的扫开我本性上因为时间和过去埋上的灰尘。ISA就像一个舞台，只要我想，就有机会，有不同的人帮我在这展现自己。因此，我才能在短短四年里从一个常常害羞，不太勇敢和成熟的小孩，变成一个能够直面自己的野心，需求，和一切的孩子。这里是我了解和得到归属感和贡献感的地方，所以我衷心地感谢与ISA的一切的相遇。

I thank Shirley. It seems we have been collaborating for a long time—from the Football team to Prefects, and then to School Captains. We have organized many activities together and organized the Student Council. You have shown me what it means to be serious and methodical in organizational skills. There are many things I could not have accomplished without you. Therefore, I am very grateful to have someone as excellent, responsible, and serious as you working with me to improve the ISA community and realize my imaginative ideas.

感谢Shirley。好像很早之前我们就在一起合作了，从Football team，到Prefects，再到School Captains。我们一起组织了很多活动，一起organize Student Council，你让我看到了什么是认真，什么是有条理的组织能力。有很多事情，是缺少你我都不可能完成的。因此，我很感谢在完善ISA community，在实现我天马行空的想法时，有你这样一个优秀，有责任感且认真的人和我一起。

I thank all teachers. Teachers are almost the only adults I could interact with during my student years. Your existence not only taught me the abstruse knowledge from textbooks but also served as windows through which I glimpsed what adults should be like. I observed from you the appropriate adult demeanor, then quietly imitated those aspects I recognized. Perhaps because of these experiences, I could explore the kind of person I want to become in the future and transform into who I am now.

感谢所有老师。老师几乎是我学生时代唯一可以接触到的大人。你们的存在除了教会我课本上那些晦涩难懂的知识，还是我看到大人样子的窗户。我从你们身上窥探到大人应该有的模样，再选取我认可的那些悄悄模仿，或许是因为这样的经历，我才能摸索出未来自己想成为的样子，才能改变成现在的样子。

I thank all University Counselors who have helped me, especially Meg and Rachel. Regarding applications, I had almost no concept, no experience, and no personal goals. Therefore, I am very grateful for Ms. Meg's guidance during application season. Furthermore, I thank Ms. Meg and Ms. Rachel for their comfort and affirmation during application season, which soothed my anxiety. Additionally, I am grateful to UG for providing this opportunity to share student stories, allowing me to explore what kind of person I am as a teenager in the final stretch of high school. I think this article will become the catalyst for me to begin recording my changes and reflections.

感谢所有帮助过我的University counselors, 尤其是Meg和Rachel。对于申请，我几乎没有任何概念，任何经验，也没有属于自己的目标，因此我很感谢Ms.Meg在申请季时候给予我的指导。同时，感谢Ms.Meg和Ms. Rachel在申请季中对我的安慰和肯定， 然后抚平我的焦虑。此外，我感谢也感激UG能提供分享学生故事这一机会给我，让我能在高中的最后一段时间探索属于青少年身份的自己到底是个什么样的人，我想这篇文章会成为让我开始记录自己改变和感想的契机吧。

I thank every member of Blind Support. As a child, I perhaps never imagined establishing a club with friends that would last three years and gradually attract more people to join. Every member of Blind Support has their own strengths; each is an indispensable part that supports me in continuing to lead Blind Support, allowing me to change constantly through it. Therefore, I thank every past and present member of Blind Support. This will be an unforgettable experience in my life.

感谢Blind Support 里的每一位成员。小时候的我或许从没有想过自己和朋友建立一个能够维系三年的club，然后慢慢吸引更多的人加入我。Blind Support每一位都有自己的特长，每一位都是必不可少的一部分，然后支撑着我继续lead Blind Support，让我从中不断的改变。因此，感谢曾经和现在的每一位Blind Support成员，这将是我人生中难以忘怀的一段经历。

I thank the ISA HS Football Team. We encourage each other when we lose and cheer for each other when we win. In my impression, this is a team that always has vitality and inclusiveness. During many moments when I wanted to give up during practice, perhaps it was because of such a team, because of the sense of satisfaction and contribution after matches, that I could enjoy this sport and continue playing football until the end of G12. So, I want to thank every member of the HS football team, as well as our coach Mr. Ross. This is perhaps a happiness I will extremely miss in the future yet find difficult to experience again.

感谢ISA HS Football Team。我们会在输球的时候相互鼓励，赢球的时候为彼此欢呼。在我的印象里，这是个永远有活力和包容力的球队。在很多练球练的想放弃的时候，或许就是因为这样一个球队，因为比赛结束后满足感和贡献感才能让我享受这个运动，才能支撑着我踢球踢到了G12结束。所以，我想感谢every member in HS football team, 以及我们的coach Mr. Ross，这或许是我在未来会极其怀念难却再难以体验到的幸福吧。

I thank all the people and things I have encountered in my life—it could be internet friends I've never met, main characters and NPCs in animations and games, a book I happened to pick up in a bookstore, a ray of sunshine hitting me in the morning, or a breeze on the way home in the evening. Although I haven't elaborated on your significance to me above, at some point, you touched me, encouraged me, moved me, taught me, or even changed something about me. The current me is unconsciously carrying what I've gained from you or growing because of your existence. Therefore, I am thankful for everything that has appeared in my life.

感谢我生命里遇到的所有人和物，可能是素未谋面的网友，可能是动漫和游戏里的大主角和NPC，可能是书店里我偶然拿起的一本书，可能是早晨出门照到的一束阳光，傍晚回家路上的一阵风。或许我没有在上面细细道说你对我的意义，但是在曾经的某一刻你触动过我，鼓励过我，感动过我，教会过我甚至改变过我什么，而当下的我正无意识的带着从你身上的得到的东西或因你的存在而成长。因此，感谢出现在我生命里的所有。

Finally, I thank my passionate, contradictory self who is willing to change while maintaining certain principles.

最后，感谢热烈的，矛盾的，愿意改变也有所坚持的自己。